{"id":262,"date":"2016-05-29T11:31:10","date_gmt":"2016-05-29T18:31:10","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/ogbornelaw.com\/?p=262"},"modified":"2023-07-24T21:54:33","modified_gmt":"2023-07-24T21:54:33","slug":"5-tips-fighting-right-way","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/webtechs-designs.com\/2023Ogborne\/5-tips-fighting-right-way\/","title":{"rendered":"5 Tips to Fighting the Right Way"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Some couples believe that arguing or fighting is a sign of your love for each other.<\/p>\n<p>Whether that\u2019s true or not, the fact is that disagreements are going to occur during the course of a long-term relationship.<\/p>\n<p>There is a right way to argue, and a wrong way.<\/p>\n<p>Are you fighting right?<\/p>\n<p>Let\u2019s explore five key ways you can argue better and keep your relationship positive through conflicts and differences of opinion.<\/p>\n<div id=\"ez-toc-container\" class=\"ez-toc-v2_0_76 counter-hierarchy ez-toc-counter ez-toc-grey ez-toc-container-direction\">\n<div class=\"ez-toc-title-container\">\n<p class=\"ez-toc-title\" style=\"cursor:inherit\">Table of Contents<\/p>\n<span class=\"ez-toc-title-toggle\"><a href=\"#\" class=\"ez-toc-pull-right ez-toc-btn ez-toc-btn-xs ez-toc-btn-default ez-toc-toggle\" aria-label=\"Toggle Table of Content\"><span class=\"ez-toc-js-icon-con\"><span class=\"\"><span class=\"eztoc-hide\" style=\"display:none;\">Toggle<\/span><span class=\"ez-toc-icon-toggle-span\"><svg style=\"fill: #999;color:#999\" xmlns=\"http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\" class=\"list-377408\" width=\"20px\" height=\"20px\" viewBox=\"0 0 24 24\" fill=\"none\"><path d=\"M6 6H4v2h2V6zm14 0H8v2h12V6zM4 11h2v2H4v-2zm16 0H8v2h12v-2zM4 16h2v2H4v-2zm16 0H8v2h12v-2z\" fill=\"currentColor\"><\/path><\/svg><svg style=\"fill: #999;color:#999\" class=\"arrow-unsorted-368013\" xmlns=\"http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\" width=\"10px\" height=\"10px\" viewBox=\"0 0 24 24\" version=\"1.2\" baseProfile=\"tiny\"><path d=\"M18.2 9.3l-6.2-6.3-6.2 6.3c-.2.2-.3.4-.3.7s.1.5.3.7c.2.2.4.3.7.3h11c.3 0 .5-.1.7-.3.2-.2.3-.5.3-.7s-.1-.5-.3-.7zM5.8 14.7l6.2 6.3 6.2-6.3c.2-.2.3-.5.3-.7s-.1-.5-.3-.7c-.2-.2-.4-.3-.7-.3h-11c-.3 0-.5.1-.7.3-.2.2-.3.5-.3.7s.1.5.3.7z\"\/><\/svg><\/span><\/span><\/span><\/a><\/span><\/div>\n<nav><ul class='ez-toc-list ez-toc-list-level-1 ' ><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-3'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-1\" href=\"https:\/\/webtechs-designs.com\/2023Ogborne\/5-tips-fighting-right-way\/#1_Reframe_Your_Approach\" >1. Reframe Your Approach<\/a><\/li><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-3'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-2\" href=\"https:\/\/webtechs-designs.com\/2023Ogborne\/5-tips-fighting-right-way\/#2_Take_Ownership\" >2. Take Ownership<\/a><\/li><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-3'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-3\" href=\"https:\/\/webtechs-designs.com\/2023Ogborne\/5-tips-fighting-right-way\/#3_Be_Respectful\" >3. Be Respectful<\/a><\/li><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-3'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-4\" href=\"https:\/\/webtechs-designs.com\/2023Ogborne\/5-tips-fighting-right-way\/#4_Stop_and_check\" >4. Stop and check<\/a><\/li><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-3'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-5\" href=\"https:\/\/webtechs-designs.com\/2023Ogborne\/5-tips-fighting-right-way\/#5_Compromise\" >5. Compromise<\/a><\/li><\/ul><\/nav><\/div>\n<h3><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"1_Reframe_Your_Approach\"><\/span>1. Reframe Your Approach<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h3>\n<p>There\u2019s a difference between arguing and having a conversation about different viewpoints.<\/p>\n<p>There is no need to yell, scream, accuse, or make each other feel bad when you\u2019re in a loving relationship.<\/p>\n<p>If you find that your emotions are escalating and that you\u2019re losing control, acknowledge that quickly. This is your partner; it\u2019s okay to be vulnerable. You can say, \u201cI\u2019m getting upset and struggling to control my feelings. Give me a minute to calm down.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>This creates the space you need.<\/p>\n<p>You can then shift your view from fighting to discussing; there is a difference. Once you know that you\u2019re having a discussion, your whole demeanor will change, making resolution more possible.<\/p>\n<h3><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"2_Take_Ownership\"><\/span>2. Take Ownership<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h3>\n<p>Your next shift is from blaming your partner to taking ownership of your feelings. No one can make you feel anything.<\/p>\n<p>When you accuse your partner of doing that, you\u2019re not being responsible for your own feelings and the way you\u2019ve interpreted things. Instead of saying, \u201cYou\u2019re making me angry,\u201d say, \u201cI feel angry and hurt when you say things to me in that way.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Accusations are a way to escalate the conversation to a full-blown fight quickly, but when you say how you feel you turn the conversation in a completely new direction.<\/p>\n<h3><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"3_Be_Respectful\"><\/span>3. Be Respectful<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h3>\n<p>In the heat of the moment, it\u2019s easy to fly off the rails and drop insults, but those words can hurt long after the conversation has ended.<\/p>\n<p>Take a deep breath and remember that you love this person sitting across from you. You want to know what he or she is thinking, so respect their opinion and feelings.<\/p>\n<p>If you\u2019re angry enough to really attack your partner, perhaps it\u2019s time for a timeout during which you can breathe, clear your head, and start to look at the issues in a new light.<\/p>\n<p>There\u2019s nothing wrong with taking a break during an argument; just be sure that you leave the conversation with positive intentions. If you don\u2019t then you may have lingering anger between the two of you. When you come back, you will be ready to be respectful of your differences.<\/p>\n<h3><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"4_Stop_and_check\"><\/span>4. Stop and check<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h3>\n<p>When we\u2019re angry, we stop listening because we \u201cknow that already\u201d, we\u2019re so eager to share our own viewpoints, or we even want to shift the blame away from us.<\/p>\n<p>The truth is that sometimes what it sounds like they said isn\u2019t what they actually meant.<\/p>\n<p>If you always assume that your partner is someone who loves you it\u2019s unlikely that they\u2019re looking to intentionally hurt you.<\/p>\n<p>By restating what you\u2019ve heard your partner say and what the pending challenges are, you are much more likely to stick to the issues.<\/p>\n<p>An example is, \u201cWhen you say it that way, it sounds to me like you\u2019re saying I\u2019m stupid. Is that your intention?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>This gives your partner a chance to understand the impact of their words right away without you having to be defensive.<\/p>\n<h3><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"5_Compromise\"><\/span>5. Compromise<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h3>\n<p>At the end of the day, you are a couple and you have a partnership you want to respect.<\/p>\n<p>No two people will ever see eye-to-eye on every issue, and hot-button topics of money, children, and sex tend to cause even the nicest people to create conflict. It would be a pretty boring relationship if you agreed on everything anyway.<\/p>\n<p>Look at every conversation, argument, discussion, or even fight as a way to learn more about yourself, your partner, and your relationship.<\/p>\n<p>What do you have in common? How can you work together to create a positive outcome?<\/p>\n<p>If you reframe your approach to your conflict, take ownership of your own thoughts and opinions, remain respectful of your partner\u2019s feelings, and clarify what you\u2019re hearing to ensure you\u2019re on the same page, you\u2019ll be better equipped to find a compromise that works best for you and your family.<\/p>\n<p>Remember, it\u2019s better to lose an argument and win the relationship.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Disagreements. Arguments. Fights. Whatever you want to call them, they happen in relationships. But is there a way to keep them from blowing up your marriage? Yes! We review five simple steps that will help you and your partner &#8220;fight right&#8221;.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":11673,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[38,39],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-262","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-communication","category-marriage","category-38","category-39","description-off"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v24.4 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>5 Tips to Fighting the Right Way - Ogborne Law, PLC<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Couples argue, couples fight. The trick to having a healthy, successful relationship is to fight the right way. Learn how to win the relationship.\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"noindex, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"5 Tips to Fighting the Right Way\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Couples argue, couples fight. The trick to having a healthy, successful relationship is to fight the right way. 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