{"id":355,"date":"2016-07-02T09:06:22","date_gmt":"2016-07-02T16:06:22","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/ogbornelaw.com\/?p=355"},"modified":"2023-07-24T21:41:40","modified_gmt":"2023-07-24T21:41:40","slug":"divorce-contested-collaboration","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/webtechs-designs.com\/2023Ogborne\/divorce-contested-collaboration\/","title":{"rendered":"Divorce: Contested or Collaborative?"},"content":{"rendered":"<div id=\"ez-toc-container\" class=\"ez-toc-v2_0_76 counter-hierarchy ez-toc-counter ez-toc-grey ez-toc-container-direction\">\n<div class=\"ez-toc-title-container\">\n<p class=\"ez-toc-title\" style=\"cursor:inherit\">Table of Contents<\/p>\n<span class=\"ez-toc-title-toggle\"><a href=\"#\" class=\"ez-toc-pull-right ez-toc-btn ez-toc-btn-xs ez-toc-btn-default ez-toc-toggle\" aria-label=\"Toggle Table of Content\"><span class=\"ez-toc-js-icon-con\"><span class=\"\"><span class=\"eztoc-hide\" style=\"display:none;\">Toggle<\/span><span class=\"ez-toc-icon-toggle-span\"><svg style=\"fill: #999;color:#999\" xmlns=\"http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\" class=\"list-377408\" width=\"20px\" height=\"20px\" viewBox=\"0 0 24 24\" fill=\"none\"><path d=\"M6 6H4v2h2V6zm14 0H8v2h12V6zM4 11h2v2H4v-2zm16 0H8v2h12v-2zM4 16h2v2H4v-2zm16 0H8v2h12v-2z\" fill=\"currentColor\"><\/path><\/svg><svg style=\"fill: #999;color:#999\" class=\"arrow-unsorted-368013\" xmlns=\"http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\" width=\"10px\" height=\"10px\" viewBox=\"0 0 24 24\" version=\"1.2\" baseProfile=\"tiny\"><path d=\"M18.2 9.3l-6.2-6.3-6.2 6.3c-.2.2-.3.4-.3.7s.1.5.3.7c.2.2.4.3.7.3h11c.3 0 .5-.1.7-.3.2-.2.3-.5.3-.7s-.1-.5-.3-.7zM5.8 14.7l6.2 6.3 6.2-6.3c.2-.2.3-.5.3-.7s-.1-.5-.3-.7c-.2-.2-.4-.3-.7-.3h-11c-.3 0-.5.1-.7.3-.2.2-.3.5-.3.7s.1.5.3.7z\"\/><\/svg><\/span><\/span><\/span><\/a><\/span><\/div>\n<nav><ul class='ez-toc-list ez-toc-list-level-1 ' ><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-2'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-1\" href=\"https:\/\/webtechs-designs.com\/2023Ogborne\/divorce-contested-collaboration\/#Learn_The_True_Cost_of_Contested_Divorce_and_Why_Collaborative_Divorce_is_Better\" >Learn The True Cost of Contested Divorce and Why Collaborative Divorce is Better<\/a><\/li><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-2'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-2\" href=\"https:\/\/webtechs-designs.com\/2023Ogborne\/divorce-contested-collaboration\/#Contested_Divorce\" >Contested Divorce<\/a><\/li><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-2'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-3\" href=\"https:\/\/webtechs-designs.com\/2023Ogborne\/divorce-contested-collaboration\/#Collaborative_Divorce\" >Collaborative Divorce<\/a><\/li><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-2'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-4\" href=\"https:\/\/webtechs-designs.com\/2023Ogborne\/divorce-contested-collaboration\/#The_True_Cost_of_Divorce\" >The True Cost of Divorce<\/a><\/li><\/ul><\/nav><\/div>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Learn_The_True_Cost_of_Contested_Divorce_and_Why_Collaborative_Divorce_is_Better\"><\/span>Learn The True Cost of Contested Divorce and Why Collaborative Divorce is Better<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p>There comes a moment when, with crystal clarity, you realize that your marriage is at an ending point. When you realize, no matter what, nothing will bring it back from the brink. It\u2019s heartbreaking, changing your family in new and stressful ways. It\u2019s easy to visualize the kind of challenges it will bring to you, your kids, and your ex.<\/p>\n<p>The one thing most people don\u2019t consider\u2014it\u2019s expensive! Let\u2019s breakdown how divorce looks in terms of its true costs.<\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Contested_Divorce\"><\/span>Contested Divorce<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p>Contested divorce is war of attorney vs. attorney waged on the battlefield of your family\u2019s future.<\/p>\n<p>Brutal, bloody, and painful, a contested divorce is usually what people imagine when they think of divorce \u2013 attorneys using legal tactics that ultimately tear apart families. And even though there\u2019s a \u201cwinner\u201d at the end, the truth is that only the attorney ends up the winner.<\/p>\n<p><em>Financial Cost<\/em><\/p>\n<p>A contested divorce is a he said \/ she said situation in which each person hires his or her own attorney, who spends hours working on your case, both in office and in court.<\/p>\n<p>One of the first things an attorney will ask you for is a completed asset evaluation worksheet. The asset evaluation is not designed to help the attorney divide the assets. Its primary purpose is to determine how much money is available and whether or not it makes sense for them to take the case.<\/p>\n<p>If there\u2019s not enough for them to get paid, they\u2019ll most likely leave it alone. We\u2019ve seen many attorneys take the case and later realize their client won\u2019t be able to pay. Once this happens, they are abandoned by their attorney to figure this out on their own.<\/p>\n<p>Remember, attorneys charge by the hour and need a retainer to get started. Since your retainer is usually around $5,000 to $10,000, you\u2019ll need that money upfront before the attorney will even take on your case.<\/p>\n<p>Hourly, attorneys charge between $250 and $500. Assume that roughly 100\u2013200 hours will be needed for your case, depending on its complexity level (we are not exaggerating \u2013 when you factor in custody, parenting plans, division of assets, spousal support, child support, it really adds up).<\/p>\n<p>Furthermore, if your case actually goes to trial, you\u2019re looking at an average case time of 17.6 months to conclusion.<\/p>\n<p>Oh! And you need to multiply the attorney costs by two! That means you\u2019re looking at $25,000 to $50,000 PER PERSON at $250 per hour, and most attorneys are more.<\/p>\n<p>The worst part, even if a divorce attorney takes you on, it doesn\u2019t mean they\u2019ll keep you on. As the cost of the divorce rises, they\u2019ll need more money to keep it going. And if you run out of the cash to pay, they\u2019ll stop working for you \u2013 leaving you high and dry, stuck figuring out what to do next.<\/p>\n<p><em>Emotional Cost<\/em><\/p>\n<p>When you go through a contested divorce, the emotional toll is incalculable to you and your kids.<\/p>\n<p>People going through a contested divorce report feelings of isolation, frustration, depression, anger, and sadness. Each new wrinkle introduced by your ex makes the process feel even more exhausting.<\/p>\n<p>Furthermore, as hard as it is on you, it\u2019s your kids that really suffer. Even if your children are older, don\u2019t be fooled into thinking they won\u2019t pay an emotional cost.<\/p>\n<p>A divorce is emotionally troubling enough for children. When it\u2019s contested, it often puts the kids in a situation where they feel like they are forced to choose a parent. And worse, you can easily miss the emotional pain your kids are feeling because you\u2019re caught up in your own world of pain and frustration.<\/p>\n<p>The reality is that contested divorce has no mechanism in place to ensure your kids don\u2019t slip through the cracks while you\u2019re working your way to a conclusion with your ex.<\/p>\n<p>Being in court and throwing barbs doesn\u2019t do much to help your relationship, especially when there are children involved and you\u2019re going to be working together as co-parents for the foreseeable future.<\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Collaborative_Divorce\"><\/span>Collaborative Divorce<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p><em>Financial Cost<\/em><\/p>\n<p>Now let\u2019s look at a different approach. Collaborative divorce is one in which the spouses work together, along with their children, to identify outcomes that will benefit everyone. More than purely mediation, collaborative divorce incorporates attorneys (yes, one for each spouse), a financial advisor, mediator, and communications coach.<\/p>\n<p>Instead of an amount upfront and hourly billing, an Ogborne Law collaborative divorce is based on a flat, fixed fee depending on your situation.<\/p>\n<p><em>And these are out-the-door prices that you can budget, as a family. Each person in the marriage doesn\u2019t pay separately, yet everyone receives the same level of support in the process.<\/em><\/p>\n<p><em>Emotional Cost<\/em><\/p>\n<p>We won\u2019t lie. Whether your divorce is contested or collaborative, there is always an emotional cost to be paid. When it comes to collaborative divorce, it\u2019s still a stressful and emotional process \u2013 change always is.<\/p>\n<p>Using our collaborative model, however, you\u2019ll find there\u2019s a support mechanism built in to help with communication between parties. This makes the agreement process easier, reducing stress and getting things accomplished faster.<\/p>\n<p>And because we incorporate communications coaching, we make sure that everyone gets the help they need dealing with the painful feelings a divorce can bring.<\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"The_True_Cost_of_Divorce\"><\/span>The True Cost of Divorce<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p>As mentioned previously, divorce costs much more than the attorney and court fees. There will probably be spousal support, child support, relocation costs, and possibly additional mental health support for members of the family as they work through this transition.<\/p>\n<p>Divorce is expensive, both financially and emotionally.<\/p>\n<p>So the question is: <strong><em>Why would you want to make this any harder than it has to be?<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Do you want to pursue an expensive, emotionally devastating divorce that ends your marriage, destroys your family, and leaves no winners but the attorneys?<\/p>\n<p>Or would you rather have a divorce that allows you to end your marriage and restructure your family? Allowing you to keep the relationships intact even as you and your ex go separate ways.<\/p>\n<p>You have the most power to influence the outcome of your life and the lives of your kids at the very beginning of the divorce process \u2013 when you choose the path you walk.<\/p>\n<p>If you\u2019re considering divorce, you owe it to yourself, your spouse, and your children to honor the relationships you\u2019ve developed. Contact Ogborne Law to learn more about collaborative divorce.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Divorce is expensive but not all divorces cost the same. The fact is that the divorce industry is a billion dollar business in America and contested divorces represent the bulk of it. Learn the true costs of divorce.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":11659,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[32,30,40],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-355","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-collaborative-divorce","category-divorce","category-mediation","category-32","category-30","category-40","description-off"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v24.4 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>Divorce: Contested or Collaborative? - Ogborne Law, PLC<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"There may come a moment when you realize that your marriage is at an ending point. 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