Divorce is never easy. Fortunately, there is a better option that fits well with most families: collaborative divorce.<\/p>\n
These families understand that a change in address and marital status doesn\u2019t keep them from being labeled \u201cfamily.\u201d<\/p>\n
Together, the parents are willing to work together to find some common ground to help their children and themselves deal with the changes associated with divorce.<\/p>\n
The Musselmanns<\/strong><\/p>\n When the Musselmanns decided to divorce, it was hard not just for their children but also for their extended families. Divorces just didn\u2019t happen to their family; at least that\u2019s what they heard from everyone.<\/p>\n The marriage wasn\u2019t working any longer, and Seth and Amy needed to make a change. They\u2019d been young when they married, and by the time they were in their late 30s, they\u2019d grown so far apart they didn\u2019t see a way to get back together. Of course, they had their children, Becky, aged 12 and Connor, aged 8, to consider. They chose collaborative divorce.<\/p>\n \u201cThis process worked so well for our family,\u201d said Amy. \u201cBecause we went through it together, we were able to continue to call ourselves family, and that made a huge difference for our parents and everyone else who knew us together. Our transition was easier because of this process.\u201d<\/p>\n Seth felt it was also better for their children. \u201cI didn\u2019t want to be an absentee dad\u2014ever. By choosing collaborative divorce, we didn\u2019t leave our parenting arrangements at the mercy of the courts. Now Amy and I share responsibility for raising our children, and I think it\u2019s made us even better parents now that we\u2019re divorced.\u201d<\/p>\n The Bronsons<\/strong><\/p>\n Even with a collaborative divorce, there can be some bumps in the road. For the Bronsons, that bump was infidelity. Still, even with that breech of trust, Tom and Cheryl wanted to do what was best for their children.<\/p>\n \u201cI won\u2019t lie; working together on this divorce was not easy,\u201d shared Cheryl. \u201cI had a hard time even looking at Tom after his affair, much less collaborating with him on how to separate our family. It wasn\u2019t my idea to divorce anyway, so there was a lot of emotion.\u201d<\/p>\n Tom saw things similarly yet differently: \u201cI definitely felt guilty about the whole thing, and I had challenges working with Cheryl. I knew she had lost trust in me, but I applaud her for not using her anger with me to come between the kids and me. That would have been unbearable.\u201d<\/p>\n Tom and Cheryl were happy to have access to counselors and financial planners during their divorce proceedings since the affair really changed how they saw each other.<\/p>\n While their children were unaware of the true reason for the divorce, the support they had from those involved helped them to make a little more sense of a challenging situation.<\/p>\n